Broken, But Not Destroyed

“Dear Heavenly Father, please keep your angels of protection around me”
“Dear Heavenly Father, please keep your angels of protection around me”
“Dear Heavenly Father, please keep your angels of protection around me”
All I could keep saying in my mind was “Dear Heavenly Father, please keep your angels of protection around me”

The face of evil stared down at me, 
Fist clenched, jaws tight
Verbal assaults sprawled out his mouth like flames of fire 
Each fiber of our relationship unraveled before my eyes
The very fabric of my being torn and snatched away slowly
Curled into a ball, 
Eyes hollow, blood shot red from all the tears,
Shrinking with every breath I took, 
I had reached my ends wit 
Nothing left but raw emotions, no refinement

The lion’s den hadn’t possessed this much terror when Daniel was thrown in
No more rationalizing the crazy sporadic behavior that had led to this
The man I knew was no longer there, the man I saw was unrecognizable
But I had too become unrecognizable to self
The woman I had created, the woman I had worked so hard to become had been stripped bare

One has to wonder how thy got there, but more importantly it is in that moment that one has to choose to either define oneself for oneself, or to live in the person they have been changed into

And I chose me, I will always choose me

Even when I’ve run off the road, when the path I find myself on was not in the direction of my destiny
When speed bumps and potholes that I chose to barrel over have slowed down progress because of injury, I still choose me
Even when life has to remind you that you have been here before and should know better, I take it as another learning and add it to my character as I rebuild
Or rather am rebuilt by the potters hand
I know that it is now not I who must try to create, but God who is the master builder simply has to mold me again
And in His doing, I am made whole!

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