The Beast Underneath the Clouds

What many call Chicago, she is no longer just the city of tall buildings, onions, and diverse culture...she has become a beast that must be slayed...

As I flew out at the crack of dawn, I marveled at the greatness and beauty of God. The only reason I ever look forward to a 6am flight is to see the sunrise. In many ways, more beautiful than a sunset to me, I am always taken aback by the vibrant red that gives way to a deep autumn orange followed by the bright blue that slowly but surely overtakes the black sky. 

As we near our time to descend, the beast comes into view. Vast and tall, she seems to reach for the sky, her longest stretch seems to touch the clouds. I wonder if her creators were like those in Babel, seeking to reach the heavens. For in this moment, as she sits at the shores of a great lake, that stretches out like an oceanfront, unable to see where it touches land again, I am in awe, like always. 

I describe her as the best beauty God and mankind have to offer, combined in a mosaic blend. She is my first love, where my heart always finds it way back to, but she pains me as much as she gives me joy. As the plane carries me above Lake Michigan, touching the clouds the beast dwells under, my stomach drops. I always fear flying over water, that my great demise will come tragically when my plane suddenly plummets, not to the earth, but into the great deep blue. But I am not able to dwell on my own tragic fantasy, for I cannot stop thinking about Hadiya, or the 6 year old girl we mourned for last year, as I cross over lake shore drive. 

As we move back over land, I look at the constant movement. I’ve always loved her for that, constantly moving, always changing, ahead of the game! But as I look down at the highways I’ve traveled many times that wind like a snake, or the sharp straight streets that intersections create perfect crosses and diamonds, all I see are green lights and I wonder does she ever stop…

I mean surely, we all sometimes just need to stop! Take a break! Breathe…

But what would make her stop… We crossed lake shore drive, and over buildings that were familiar to me, neighborhoods I could identify, even from the sky, and it all moved. I wondered why the 506 homicides last year couldn’t stop her? Maybe, I thought to myself, if we placed all those bodies, all 506 at the circle…the circle, where interstate 55 joins 90/94 and then dumps you off onto  interstate 290... I wondered if that totaled 506, all those intersections..they totaled 529. Well not bad, because all we need are half of the homicides from January to make that number. So if we placed 529 bodies down at the circle, would she stop then?

A crazy thought maybe… that was until, just as that thought finished in my head, we landed. I turned on my phone and went to Facebook. Scrolling through the stories on the newsfeed, my god brother’s status catches my eye…”woman shot to death on lake shore drive!”

My heart began to drop, but stopped midway. The thought, no the reality of murder was becoming to familiar to it. No wonder my heart cried at lake shore..not just for those young girls, and hundreds of young black males, but now, this woman who had been murdered in her mini van on the ramp. 

No place is safe! At first, you had to be careful what blocks you took a stroll down that were not in your neighborhood. Then you had to be careful at stop signs on the southside. Now, you can’t even escape in your car on the ramp to the expressway?!?!? 

She’s a beast, that will not stop, she has become too accustomed to movement. By now, I am seated in O’Hare International Airport, waiting to continue on to Buffalo, with people from around the world, unaware of the torment and agony that dwells right outside the windows they pass. But I too, have just become a passer-byer, in my own home. I too, will continue on to my “final destination“, and not worry about the horror that I have left behind…

I have come to accept that I cannot create the change for Chicago..she must do it herself… she will continue to cry out as the clouds carry her cry out to the great waters, until those who dwell among her answer the call. The lake was frozen over as I headed back in the sky on my way to Buffalo… I hope that the hearts of those she carries has not frozen over too.